When a Student's Behavior Suddenly Changes

Samantha Behne

You know that student—the one who’s been steady all year. Maybe they’ve been quiet and easygoing, or maybe they’ve been a leader in the classroom. But then, almost overnight, something shifts. They start acting out in ways that don’t match who they’ve been all year. Talking back, refusing to work, picking fights with classmates—behaviors that seem completely out of character.

That’s exactly what I’ve been experiencing with one of my second graders. For months, he was fine. And then, over the last two weeks, it’s like a different child has walked into my room. I know something must be going on, but I haven’t been able to figure it out yet. And in the meantime, his behavior keeps spiraling.

What do we do when this happens? When a student who has been fine suddenly isn’t? While I don’t have all the answers, here are a few things I remind myself to do in situations like this:

1. Assume There’s a Reason

It’s easy to jump straight to frustration. But behavior is communication, and if a student’s actions have changed dramatically, there’s a reason for it—even if we don’t know what it is yet. Instead of asking, “Why is he doing this?” try asking, “What’s going on that’s making him act this way?” That small shift in mindset can change how we respond.

2. Give Them a Way to Talk (But on Their Terms)

Some kids will tell you right away if something’s wrong. Others need time, space, or a different approach. A casual, “Hey, I’ve noticed you haven’t been yourself lately. Is everything okay?” can open the door. But if they don’t want to talk, that’s okay too. Offering a journal, a check-in note, or even a quiet moment together can give them another way to express what they need.

3. Keep Your Expectations (and Support) Steady

When a student starts acting out, it’s tempting to either clamp down harder or let things slide. But kids need consistency, especially when they’re struggling. Keep holding them accountable, but do it with patience and understanding. “I care about you, and I know this isn’t like you. Let’s figure this out together.”

4. Loop in Support

You don’t have to figure it out alone. Talk to their past teachers, check in with parents, or bring in a counselor if needed. Sometimes, something’s going on at home. Sometimes, a pattern emerges that we wouldn’t have seen on our own. More eyes on the situation can help find a solution faster.

At the end of the day, our students are little humans with big emotions, and sometimes they just need us to notice, to care, and to remind them that whatever they’re going through—they’re not going through it alone.

And that’s something we can do.